Wednesday, December 24, 2008

Why I Need to Know Everything

I guess late Christmas Eve isn't the time I expected to resume blogging, but I wouldn't have expected the whole family to not have a single present wrapped yet, either. "We're a family of slackers," Melanie said. As it turns out, I didn't expect to be enjoying winter break so much, so I guess that makes for a whole round of unexpectation. Since I only had a few days to transition from studying in Beijing this summer to going to school, I haven't had a break longer than four days since June. Each day I wake up and am amazed that it's still vacation.

Vacation is always tough for me, though, because I never know how that relates to accomplishment. I usually define "rest" as anything that doesn't feel like work, but I have to watch out because the pleasure I get from doing personal projects is really similar to the pleasure I get finishing work. For example, I've been making a computer game intermittently over the last few years. It's almost finished. Andrew and I were playing it tonight. It's to the point, though, where the work the game needs is difficult and not that important. So it's mostly my perfectionistic streak that's making me continue. And I enjoy writing, but if I think of blogging as a duty then I feel overloaded. I was actually very conflicted about blogging tonight because I anticipate feeling a sense of accomplishment, and that worries me.

One thing I have been doing, though, is going to Barnes and Noble to read. I read Malcolm Gladwell's book Outliers. It's a boring hypothesis (successful people have other things--parents, wealth, luck, culture--besides their own grit and intelligence going for them) but he cites so many interesting studies. In one page he happened to mention an IQ test for really smart people, and gave an example. "Teeth is to hen as nest is to ___"

I don't know the answer. And I think the problem is not because of my analogical skills, but because I don't know enough about teeth and hens. What's the relationship between teeth and hens? Hens are female, do teeth have something to do with that? Teeth have calcium, do hens have something to do with that? And once I did figure it out I'd have to be able to apply it to nests. I don't know anything about nests.

A few nights ago I was reading online about a study that concluded two things about octopuses: they prefer HDTV; and they have no personalities. If I only knew more, I found myself thinking, about the differences between regular television and HDTV, I'd be able to assess the researcher's results. One comment mentioned pixels and frame rate and went on to a complicated discussion about persistance of vision that I wish I had the background knowledge to follow.

That's all I'm asking for, really. The background knowledge for the world. Some people consider knowledge to be an end, but really it's only as good as you can apply it when wanted.

The point, of course, isn't to know about HDTV per se, it's to know that "hens' teeth" is a phrase as is "mare's nest." Neither of which I'd heard of before I googled the analogy, and so according to Hoeflin I might not be the smartest person ever. Wisdom is applied knowledge, so to become wise I have something to work on. But maybe I should wait until after Christmas break to do the real work on that.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

That Giggly Phase

Blogging's fallen by the wayside in the days leading up to the LSAT. It didn't go as well as I hoped. I think I'm going to be disappointed with the score. My current schedule isn't much more conducive to blogging. I have two papers due by Wednesday and they are both in the beginning stages, shall we say.

I think I've reached my limit of fruitful output tonight. It's late and this is as far as I've gotten in my paper on Joyce.

look at my thesis!! this is my totally legitimate second (that is, thesis-ical) sentence, devoted entirely to hugh kenner and his dead faults, not to say that his deadness, that is, his death or dying or in the process being in a state of no longer declining through the abyss of human temporality, can be contained by what is now known to be the most extravagent expression of joyce's voices (so to speak) in his pocket at this time which is unavoidably long, however inextricably tasty the sentences might be. it is large and powerful and has voices. many voices.


Then the said creature began to laugh and laugh and laugh (indifferent voices). You are no good wife.

I wish myself well in the coming days. And a merry Christmas to all.

Monday, December 1, 2008

Katy Perry Hates Women or Gays

I'm warming up to writing my English papers. Let me practice by doing a "reading" of Katy Perry's song...

Before I start analyzing a pop song, I need to clarify that I know hits don't need to be deep for people to like them. I'm okay with "Grillz", appreciate the cohesion of "Hey Ya" even if the chorus has one and a half words, and love word play, self-centered or not, like Chamillionaire freestyling. But I do expect that a song doesn't contradict itself. In logic, there's a fundamental proposition of non-contradiction. Literary analysis has that too. People don't love nonsense, so if a work looks like nonsense, there must be an explanation for why. Let's examine what's strange about the lyrics of Hot N Cold before we propose an explanation.

The #1-charted hit in America's Top 40 this week is "Hot N Cold" by Katy Perry. It's a catchy song sung by a woman who seems to be empowering women to take control in relationships. Her significant other (in the music video, her fiance) won't commit and the singer is finally doing something about it.

At least, that's what the song is about. But if you look at the lyrics, Perry's words clash with this theme of gender equality. I'm pasting the lyrics in full; if you're going to be offended, pretend it's the word "blitch."

You change your mind

Like a girl changes clothes

Yeah you PMS

Like a bitch, I would know


And you overthink

Always speak cryptically

I should know

That you're no good for me


Chorus [

'Cause you're hot then you're cold

You're yes then you're no

You're in then you're out

You're up then you're down


You're wrong when it's right

It's black and it's white

We fight, we break up

We kiss, we make up


You!

You don't really want to stay, no

You!

But you don't really want to go-o


You're hot then you're cold

You're yes then you're no

You're in then you're out

You're up then you're down

]


We used to be

Just like twins, so in sync

The same energy

Now's a dead battery


Used to laugh 'bout nothing

Now you're plain boring

I should know that you're not gonna change


[Chorus]


Someone call the doctor

Got a case of a love bi-polar

Stuck on a roller coaster

Can't get off this ride


You change your mind

Like a girl changes clothes


[Chorus]

Frustration in a relationship is nothing new, and the song's metaphors are hardly poetic enough to sustain the theme. Instead, Perry speculates as to the underlying causes of her frustration. The song starts and ends with the declaration, "You change your mind / Like a girl changes clothes." It's feminine capriciousness that's the problem. A few weeks ago I had these lines in my head and posted my status on Facebook as "Will changes minds like a girl changes clothes." I received several comments accusing me of chauvanism.

How curious that a woman would pen them! In fact, the association between women and uncurable, undesirable character traits is stronger when we consider the next line. "Yeah you PMS / Like a bitch, I would know." Again, the problem is the masculine acting feminine. Behavior that is reproachably unnatural in a man is an unavoidable biological determinant of behavior in women. The singer cites personal experience as a testament both to her conclusion that he should change and to the accuracy of her comparison.

The message appears to be, "Don't act like a girl." Perry's identification of herself as acting bitchy, taken with her yet-confident tone, inclines us to believe that she doesn't consider women themselves to be bad. It's just that two women in a relationship is too many.

It's not good enough that one person act womanly (inconstant, sentimental, irrational) and one act manly (stabilizing, shepherding, reasoning). That's the relationship already! The singer is the man of the relationship: she's addressing the problem, she's not letting emotion get in the way of breaking up, she's not changing her mind, she's annoyed at indecision and opaque statements.

What's dissatisfactory about this situation isn't the singer's (masculine) character. We cheer on the singer. What's wrong is that the singer isn't free to be herself. A relationship with this unmanageable guy limits her self-expression, because if she acted feminine things would devolve even further.

She needs him to be opposite. At the beginning, the singer relished her "twin" who was "so in synch," but once the initial fun wore off, the pair is "a dead battery" because there are no more differences to convert from chemical energy to eletrical energy. Love is complementary.

Interestingly enough, Perry used to be on a Christian label. In the church there's a split between views of gender relations called "complementarianism" and "egalitarianism." The first is more traditional and sees men and women as two halves of a puzzle, each with respective roles and responsibilities. The second thinks of men and women as being faded pages which, when laid on top of each other, gives greater clarity than each individually. Thus, under complementarianism, women might take care of the kids, and under egalitarianism, women might be pastors. Apparently Katy Perry is a complementarian.

My only question is, after listening to the very liberal "I Kissed a Girl", it seems Katy Perry can't decide between being shocking and being conservative. Has she found true womanhood?